Before I start going into detail on all the wonderful adventures of being single and Mormon and living in Utah, I want to make sure we have a basic foundation of the world of Latter-day Saint Singledom. So I’ve come up with a list of common terms and cultural quirks among the LDS religion that will frequently used in my posts.

Singles Ward: A religious congregation specifically comprised of single or unmarried individuals. The purpose is to encourage singles to socialize, eat, and remember that it’s really pathetic to be single. Many social activities in a single Mormon’s life spawns from the singles ward.

FHE: Family Home Evening. A common practice among LDS members to set aside time each week to spend with family—traditionally designated on a Monday. Because single adults often don’t have families, most singles wards host an activity on Monday evenings.

Bishop: Spiritual leader of the ward. Although any worthy male may be called as a Bishop, it is advantageous to a singles ward to have a monetarily successful bishop with a big home with lots of toys to use for single socializing. A cabin in the woods and houseboats at Powell are major bonuses. Single ward bishops get extra points in heaven for every marriage that spawns from the ward during his jurisdiction.

EC: Eternal Companion. Also known as “the one.” Mormons believe marriage companions will be together for all eternity (and not “until death do us part”). This often puts unduly pressure on any first date–for you tend to think if you can stand being with that person forever and ever. Potential ECs are often evaluated from the first date, and in some cases, from the minute he/she walks into church.

Stake Center: Multiple wards in a geographic area are compiled into a “stake.” The Stake Center is typically a larger-than-average church building where many activities and functions are held.

Institute: If 3 hours of church every Sunday isn’t enough of a spiritual rally to get you through your week, or doesn’t offer enough options of potential ECs, the church offers extra curricular classes throughout the week known as Institute.

Sweet Spirit: A term used to describe a young woman who is kind, smart, and spiritually strong, yet physically unacceptable to date (i.e. she’s ugly).

Molly Mormon: A female member of the church who follows strictly to the decree of righteous Mormon living—such as a life solely devoted to marriage, children, and scrapbooking about said marriage and children.

Peter Priesthood: A male version of the above. Typical characteristics would include not watching football on Sunday, strict avoidance of caffeinated beverages, and no shame to walk out of a PG movie that says more than 3 swear words.

The important thing to note about Molly Mormons and Peter Priesthoods is that there are varying interpretations of what is okay and not okay. Mormons, like many humans, have guilty pleasures, which doesn’t make them an unworthy Mormon. However, in dating, conflict can arise if your date says she won’t go out with you again until you throw away your collection of Seth Rogen movies.

BYU: BYU, or Brigham Young University, is a private school in Provo, Utah sponsored by the church. Many Mormons come from all over the country to attend this school, which statistically offers the highest percentage of potential ECs. If you leave BYU unmarried, you changes for marriage proportionally drop by ten percent every year you get older.

Zoobie: A student at BYU who is overenthusiastic about ballroom dancing, religion classes, eating ice cream at the BYU Creamery. If BYU wins a football game, they believe it was the Lord’s blessing because of BYU’s righteousness. They typically wear denim shirts and braided belts. Often the same as Molly Mormons and Peter Priesthoods.

Lastly, I also feel it is necessary to identify the cultural quirks that make Mormon dating different from how the rest of the world dates.

Sex: Pre-martial sex and other sexual acts are forbidden among Single LDS saints. This throws an interesting wrench in the mix of Mormon dating compared to the rest of the world. We not only have to deal with all the misunderstandings of men and women with a lot of sexual frustration thrown into the mix.

So…please note that when Mormons say “hooking up” they really just mean making out. When Mormons say they want to “get some,” they really just mean making out. When Mormons say he/she puts out, he/she really just makes out. When Mormons say, well, you get the idea.

Also, please note hormones play a greater role in expediting marriage. What would normally a secular 3 years to do takes a Mormon couple 3 weeks.

WoW: Word of Wisdom. The most defining characteristic of the Mormon faith, the Word of Wisdom is a law that prohibits the use of alcohol, drugs, cigarettes, and tea and coffee. Rather than asking someone if they want to get a drink, Mormons ask if you want to get an ice cream, or if you’re lucky, an artisan gelato. However, dairy products lack alcohol’s relaxing effects that often facilitate conversations and after-date hook-ups. Mormons often rely on prayer.

I hope this tutorial was helpful—particularly to my non-Mormon readers. The world of Mormon dating contains many additional factors unknown to the world of secular dating (and I didn’t discuss every one). Yet despite the differences, we are all human, and Mormons face 90% of typical boy/girl dating issues any boy or girl, would have. We just have to face them with our clothes on.